The Least Favored Son
The Least Favored Son
If you are a parent with children, how can you love them equally? How can you treat each child fairly? Let us reflect on the story shared to us by James.
- Children, are different from each other. They have different traits, attitude and character. They have different needs based on their personalities.
Ako po si James. Tatlo po kaming magkakapatid at ako ang gitnang anak. At masasabi ko na ako ang pinaka hindi gusto ng mga magulang ko.
Si Kuya Bryan, matalino at masunurin. Anuman ang sabihin nila Mama at Papa, lagi niya sinusunod. Si Lester naman, dahil bunso, ang pinaka malambing daw kaya naman laging binibigay anuman yun gustuhin at hilingin niya.
I am the least favored son. I know I am not as bright as Kuya Bryan or kasing lambing ni Lester. Nag-aaral din naman ako pero hindi kagaya ni kuya na laging top sa class. Papa said I was assertive and I tend to always speak my mind. What can I do? This is me and this is who I am.
Minsan may gusto ako, pero dahil gusto din ni Lester, iba na lang yun ibibigay sa akin kasi kailangan ko magparaya just because nakakatanda ako. Minsan, dahil mas mataas yun grade ni kuya kaya he gets the chance to choose what he wants and whatever is left, yun yung mapupunta sa akin.
Whenever Kuya or Lester asks for something, it is granted right away. But when I ask for anything, I need to justify and convince my parents first why I need it or why do I want it. I don't think it's fair.
Don't get me wrong. I am really trying my best at school. Im just not as good as my kuya. I am also obedient, it's just that I need to understand first why I need to do things. Mali ba yun?
There was this time when there was a PTA meeting at school. My father was busy at work, that is why I was hoping that my mom can come instead but she weren't able to attend. Why? Kasi kailangan niya samahan sa taekwondo training si Kuya. Bakit ganun? Hindi ba kaya ni kuya pumunta sa training mag-isa? Hatid-sundo naman siya ng service. Once every quarter lang yun PTA meeting while kuya's training is 2 times a week.
One time I need to audition in our school play for the male lead role. I asked my mom if she can come. I want her to see how good I am in acting and singing. But she said she can't come because she needs to pack and prepare things for Lester's field trip. I really felt bad.
There was this first time when my mom finally went to my school. This was when our Principal called her because I was involved in an alleged thief issue at school. I swear, I did not steal anything. Napagbintangan lang ako. Umamin din naman yun classmate ko. I was actually the witness of the incident.
But then that day, my mom got mad at me. Hindi ko maintindihan. Ilan beses ko sinabi na hindi nga ako nagnakaw pero hindi daw siya ipapatawag sa school kung wala ako ginawa. Ano ba alam ko dun? Bakit hindi niya tinanong sa Principal bakit kailangan pa siya ipatawag? Wala ako kasalanan pero bakit siya nagagalit sa akin?
Ano ba ang mali sa akin? I tried to be a good son but why do I seem to be invisible to my parents? Eventhough how hard I try, it will never be enough for them. Am I not good enough? Am I not worth enough their attention? Don't I deserve a little of their time? Do I need to be in trouble so they can give me their attention?
I just hope parents like mine can realize what children like me feel. I just wish I was never even born.
Lifechained answers. This story of James is an eye-opener to most of us. Being a parent myself, I am not perfect. It is hard to be a parent of a child, what more of 3? However, it is my resposnsibility to make them all feel loved and cared for. I need to make sure that I give each and one of them enough attention and time.
Children, are different from each other. They have different traits, attitude and character. They have different needs based on their personalities. It is very challenging, yes, but it is part of being a parent to be as versatile as we can to blend and be the parent our every child needs.
For you, James, it is better to talk to your parents. Tell them how you feel. If you can't talk to them, write them a letter. Write to them everything you want to tell them. Ask everything you want to ask. Your parents love you, please don't ever think that they don't. All parents love their children so dearly. We just have different ways of showing it but one thing for sure is undeniably true. Parents never cease to love and care for their children.
Do not hide your feelings, James. Tell it to your parents. What you feel is valid and acceptable. You have the right to feel that way. But your parents also have their right to know how you feel and what you are going through.
James, you are special in your own unique way. You deserve all the love from your parents and your feelings are valid and acknowledged. Try to be more open to your parents. Talk to them. There is no one who can understand you more that your parents.
And for parents like me, let us never lose the connection we have with our children. Communication is our bond. Let us not forget that our children are born unique and special in their own ways. Each of them deserve our love, care and utmost attention. We have to broaden our understanding with more compassion and open mind. Even how challenging it may seem, it is part of our responsibility to them. May we never cease to inspire and motivate them to be the best version of themselves and may we never fail to mold and guide them as they journey to the reality of life, continuously giving them strength, hope, faith , and all the love they need.
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